A Bit Looney
by hopefulheart108
Summary: Highroller heard the news about Hope and how she made a fool out of his cousin. So, he send his cousin after her. Will she survive? Based on some Looney Tunes cartoons.
1. Chapter 1

In East Citadel's throne room, there was Highroller sitting on his throne, looking very bored... until the Zebra Brothers rolled in and bump into his throne, making their master fall off.

"I hate it when you do that!" Highroller shouted at the twins.

"We're sorry, Master Highroller!" The Zebra Brothers said.

"What do you want?" Highroller ask. "It better be important."

"Oh, it is. Someone joined Big Green." Sparky Black said.

"Who?"

"This pink and white monkey name Hope." Sparky White said.

"How is she important?"

"Remember when you said something about a cousin Sportiflex when Harpy Eagle Queen joined?"

"Yeah?"

"Yeah... From the air ducts, we heard these funny stories about Hope and your cousin, where your cousin usually gets hurt a lot."

"What?! That monkey made a fool out of my favorite and only cousin?!"

The Zebra Brothers nodded. Highroller realizes something when he remembers some of his cousin's hobbies.

"I have a idea." Highroller said.

* * *

In Big Green's stage room, everyone was waiting for the DoReMi Band, but Hope isn't around to sit with First Squad.

"Where is she? Hope will miss them." Sonia said.

"Here's what everyone been waiting for... The DoReMi Band!" Apetrully announced.

When the spotlights hit the stage, everyone got a big surprise. The stage was decorated with cherry blossom trees and red rose bushes. Standing in the middle of the stage was Hope. In the background was the DoReMi Band, who were playing their instruments softly.

She wore a red kimono with pink cherry blossoms and white roses, white socks, a pair of getas, a pair of pink rose earrings and a gold necklace with a rose shaped ruby. She was dancing with a red fan that was decorated with pink roses, singing gently and calmly to the music.

Hope: **Seasons always come and go**

**But where are they going at such a fast pace?**

**The wind beats against the window gently**

**I get a invitation to travel to a far off land**

**I'll be gone for a bit, so don't cry**

**Let's make a pinkie promise**

**That we will certainly meet again**

**One, two, the flower petals scattered**

**And disappeared in a remote country**

**I examined one of the memories**

**I had that was hard to part with**

**And though people meet, depart, and then meet again**

**In some kind of cycle**

**This time I spent with you**

**Has been an important treasure**

**I never want to forget it**

Suddenly, the DoReMi Band's music started to sound upbeat and faster, so did Hope's dancing. When Hope dance behind one of the trees, she came out with a new outfit. She now wore clothes like Natsuki's (from Lil Pri) princess clothes but in pink, red, and white with hints of purple, Hope's ruby rose turned into a cherry blossom shaped pink diamond. Hope's voice was upbeat and excited yet a little gentle.

Hope: **In no time at all**

**You and I changed into adults**

**I'll come to love this,that, and everything**

**For a while now, I've had a wish**

**So I'm beginning to search for myself**

**Since I like so many things**

**It doesn't matter what my aspirations are**

**In this heart of mine,**

**That has only experienced obedience**

**I want to feel importance**

**I need to know which me is me**

**In order for me to feel any sense of pride**

**I'll definitely find it one day**

**An unshakable desire**

**One by one the flower petals**

**Change appearance**

**But if I were to gather them together**

**Then I could form one dream**

**Even at this momeny,**

**The beauty of flowers**

**Are unchanging**

**If I turn around**

**I can smell the **

**Affectionate fragrance of my homeland**

**I'll always be waiting**

**So let's meet here again**

Ending the song, Hope shouted a loud "HO!"

Everyone cheered loudly.

"She's a monkey of surprise." Apetrully said.

* * *

In Highroller's throne room, Highroller and the Zebra Brothers were waiting for Highroller's cousin, Sportiflex.

"Where is he?" Highroller said.

"Who are you waiting for?" A person ask him.

"My cousin Sportiflex."

"Really? My name is Sportiflex."

Highroller blinked, look at the person, and shouted," Cousin Sportiflex!"

The zebras' jaws dropped at the sight of Highroller's cousin. He look like he could be his twin instead of his cousin! The difference is he have a left, black eye and a right, white eye. Sportiflex wore the same clothes as Highroller but in black and red.

"It been so long!" Sportiflex said, who sounds just like Highroller.

"He could be Master Highroller's twin." Sparky White whispered to his brother.

"That's what a lot of people say."

"He have good hearing."

"You can stop whispering. Everyone can still hear you." Sparky Black said.

"Sorry." Sparky White said.

"What's the problem, cousin?" Sportiflex ask.

"Do you remember anything about a pink and white monkey name Hope?" Highroller ask.

"That long-tailed varmint! I remember her like it was yesterday!"

*Flashback*

_"I dare you to cross over this line." Hope said, making a line on the ground with her foot._

_"Oh yeah?" Sportiflex said._

_Then he cross over the line._

_"I dare you to cross over this line." Hope said, making another line on the ground, which Sportiflex cross over._

_"How about this one? This one? That one? That one? This one? That one? This one? That one? This one?"_

_Hope keeps making lines while Sportiflex crosses over them until he end up falling off a cliff._

*Flashback Over*

Sportiflex and Highroller could hear the Zebra Brothers laughing over the story. Sportiflex took out two guns from his hat, pointed them at the zebras, and said, "One more laugh at out of you two and I'll blast ya."

Sparky Black glupped, but Sparky White chuckled.

"Okay, I'll blast ya." Sportiflex said.

He pulled the trigger, but nothing happened. He look at the gun's hole and pull the trigger again. This time it worked.

"Don't worry. I'm fine." Sportiflex said with an ash covered face.


	2. Chapter 2

In the forest, Hope, Apetrully, and First Squad were looking for someone. Apetrully held a note as Hope ask, "Why are doing this?"

"Someone send a note to be here." Apetrully said.

"First Squad told me the time someone send you a note and it ended up very badly." Hope said.

"Don't remind us." Apetrully and First Squad said at the same time.

"Oh yeah... Sorry."

As They went deeper into the forest, Hope suddenly shouted, "FREEZE!"

Apetrully and First Squad froze when they heard a gunshot.

"What was that?" Mighty Ray ask, still in one place.

"I missed!"

The Big Green group slowly turn their head towards the source of the voice. Apetrully and First Squad were shocked to see 'Highroller'. With a gun!

"H-Highroller?!" Apetrully said.

"Sportiflex." Hope said with a low growl.

"Hello, little Hopesy." Sportiflex said.

"You know him?" Lin Chung ask.

"Yeah, he used to hunt me when we were little with a toy gun until he suddenly stopped." Hope said.

"I was busy." Sportiflex said.

"Like what?"

"Never mind that! Cousin Highroller told me to hunt you."

"I thought you were his twin." Mighty Ray said.

"I never said that. Anyway..."

Sportiflex turn to Hope and said, "We meet again, you long-tailed varmint!"

"So you did, you marone." Hope said.

"The word is moron." Sportiflex said.

"So are you calling yourself a fool?"

First Squad and Apetrully laughed a bit.

"You know that this kingdom isn't big enough for the two of us." Sportiflex said.

"It ain't?" Hope said.

She look around and said, "Pardon me, sport."

Hope quickly ran out and there were building noises. She came back with a hammer and a hand saw, and ask, "Now is it big enough?"

We saw there were tall buildings.

"I love her humor." Apetrully said.

"No, it still ain't big enough!" Sportiflex said, taking out a six shooter.

"No, I ain't." Hope said, taking out a seven shooter.

"Oh yes, you are!" He took out a eight shooter.

"Oh no, I ain't!" She took out a nine shooter.

"Oh yes, you are!" He took out a ten shooter.

"Oh no, I ain't!" She took out a straw labeled, _Pea Shooter._

Hope blows into it and a pea hit Sportiflex's nose. Now he looks very angry and starts to shoot at her!

"Leave her alone!" Sonia shouted.

"Don't worry! I got it!" Hope said.

She try to run away but she bumped into Sportiflex.

"Alright, wise girl, dance!" Sportiflex said.

Sportiflex shoot at Hope's feet, making her jump. Hope took out a top hat and a cane, and started to tap dance. At first, she tried to escape, but Sportiflex shoot at her and continues to dance.

"Take it, Sportiflex!" Hope said, pointing at him.

Hope tap her foot and clap her hands as Sportiflex started to dance. This made the others laugh. Especially when he dances into a mine shaft and came out covered in rocks.

"Thank you. Thank you." Hope said, bowing.

Sportiflex came over to Hope and said, "Start walking, you dog-gone, long-tailed galot!" while pointing his guns at her chest.

"Just a minute, parder!" Hope said, making his guns point at Sportiflex's chest. "You can't talk to me like that! Them's fighting words!"

Sportiflex notice what she did and turn his guns back at her chest.

"THEN them's fighting words!" Sportiflex said.

"Someday, we got to fix their grammar." Apetrully said.

"I dare you to step over this line." Hope said, making a line on the ground with her foot.

"Okay, I'm a stepping." Sportiflex said, crossing the line.

"I dare you to cross over this one." Hope said, making another line on the ground, which he did cross over.

Hope continues to make lines while Sportiflex continues to cross them as Apetrully and First Squad follows them. Hope keeps making lines until they reach a cliff. Sportiflex fell off the cliff. Hope looks a little guilty and quickly ran down. She places a matress under where Sportiflex should land and said to the audience, "You know, sometimes my conscious kind of annoys me."

She looks up and said, "But not this time!"

She took away the matress and Sportiflex fell to the ground. Hope look away at first, but saw Sportiflex was small from the fall. Then he pop back to normal.

When Hope and Sportiflex went back into the forest, Sportiflex was wearing hunting clothes and Hope was gone! He was sneaking while holding a gun and singing _A Hunting We Will Go._

"What just happened?" Mighty Ray said.

Apetrully took out a magazine out of no where, flipped through a few pages, and said, "We seem to skip _Hope the Monkey Rides Again _to _Eagle! Monkey, Eagle!_"

"What...?" Jumpy said.

"I think I got some of Hope's randomness." Apetrully said.

Then they saw Harper H. Eagle standing next to a rabbit hole.

"Where did she come from?" Mighty Ray said.

"I don't know." Lin Chung said.

"Oh Hopesy, Hopesy old pal. Can you spare a cup of black strap molasses?" Harper said.

Hope came out of the hole while holding a cup of molasses and said, "One cup of black strap molasses coming up!"

Sportiflex uses his gun to shoot holes into the cup, making the molasses come out.

"Funny, I didn't think molasses would run in the middle of August." Hope said.

"I got you, you crazy monkey!" Sportiflex said, holding the gun to the back of her neck.

"I can't look." Apetrully said, covering his eyes.

Hope sighed and said, "Look, doc. Are you looking for some trouble?"

She held out her hand, revealing a silver bracelet with _Smart Monkey _on it.

"I'm not a crazy monkey. I'm a smart monkey." Hope said.

"A smart monkey?" Sportiflex said.

"Have you got a smart monkey license?"

"Well, no, but..."

"Do you know what the penalty is for shooting a smart monkey without a smart monkey license?"

Harper was getting annoyed as she came up to Sportiflex.

"Just a par-boil minute. What is this? A cooking class? Shoot her! Shoot her!" Harper shouted.

"But I haven't got a license to shoot a smart monkey." Sportiflex said.

Harper made a _What a idiot_ stare and walk over to Hope with a smirk.

"Don't go away, Daniel Dumb. I'll be back in a flash." Harper said as she walk over to Hope with a pencil and a piece of paper. "This license permits bearer to shoot and any animal, even royalty."

Jumpy quickly hides.

"Here you are, leather sock. All nice and legal." Harper said, giving Sportiflex the license. "Hurry up, hurry up! The fine print doesn't mean a thing."

Sportiflex just stare at the audience.

"Hurry up, hurry up!" Harper said.

Sportiflex shrugged and shoot Harper, making her beak spin around until it stopped on the right side. Harper put her beak back in place.

"Here, let me see that thing." Harper said, taking the license.

She read the paper, look up, and said, "Well, I guess I'm the Goat Queen."

Hope went back into the hole and pull out a sign that says, _She's the Goat Queen._

"What?" Harper said.

Sportiflex shoot Harper again, making a beak upside down and open. She close her mouth, turn it to it's normal state, and walk up to Hope.

"You're a dirty dog." Harper said.

"And you are the Dirty Skunk Queen." Hope said.

"I'm the Dirty Skunk Queen? I'm the Dirty Skunk Queen?" Harper exclaims.

Hope pull out a sign that says, _She's the Dirty Skunk Queen._ Sportiflex shoot Harper again, making her beak on top of her head. She put it back in the right place.

"Boy, am I the Pigeon Queen." Harper said.

Hope pulled out a sign saying, _She's the Pigeon Queen._ Sportiflex shoot Harper again, making her catch her beak before it fell off. She put her beak back on and walk over to Sportiflex, following him behind a rock.

"Look, brother, what you need is a little briefing. Let's go over there and talk privately for a moment." Harper said. "Okay, now let's get back to fundamentals."

Hope shrugged and made a fake monkey out of leaves and other things she could find in the forest. Meanwhile, Harper was done telling Sportiflex the _hunt fundamentals._

"Alright, now let's go over this once more. What are you?" Harper ask.

"I'm a hunter." Sportiflex said.

"And what are you suppose to do?"

"Shoot the monkey."

"And there's the monkey! Shoot her! Shoot her!"

Sportiflex ran over to the rabbit hole and shoot the fake monkey.

"Oh my, She disintegrated!" Sportiflex gasped.

"Eh, what's up, doc? How are things going down here on Earth?" Hope ask, floating down from nowhere with a umbrella abd was dressed as an angel.

Harper smack her face in annoyance.

"Sorry, Miss Monkey. I hope I didn't hurt you too much when I killed you." Sportiflex said.

"I guess he does have a soul." Sonia said. "Now makes me wonder if he is Highroller's cousin."

"Are you serious? Why if she's dead, then I'm the Mongoose Queen!" Harper said.

Hope held up a sign that says, _She's the Mongoose Queen._ Sportiflex shoot Harper again, making her drop her beak again. She puts it back on, then walk back to the rock with Sportiflex.

"More briefing?" Sportiflex said.

"More briefing." Harper said.

Five minutes later, Harper was finished telling Sportiflex about her plan.

"So then, you got it straight. You're not going to listen to anymore signs. You're just going to listen to me, right?" Harper said.

"Right." Sportiflex said.

Back at the rabbit hole, Hope put on a fake beak and blow on a whistle which made a harpy eagle moise.

"Ah ha! So that's her little game, is it?" Harper said.

Then she came out of the rock and shouted, "Shoot the eagle! Shoot the harpy eagle!"

Sportiflex came out and shot... Harper. Harper's beak was wide open. She close it, and went on a ranting rampage.

"Oh, soot me! I enjoy it! I love the smell of burnt feathers and gunpowder and cordite. I'm the Elk Queen! Soot me! Go on. I'm the Elk Queen! I'm the Fiddler Crab Queen! Why don't you shoot me?! I'm the Fiddler Crab Queen!" Harper shouted.

Now Harper was crying on the ground.

"Hm... Now I feel bad." Hope said.

Hope saw Sportiflex pointing his gun at her. She screams and run away as he chases after her. First Squad and Apetrully chases after them.

Hope felt a tree against her back as Sportiflex point his gun at her.

"Hope!" Apetrully shouted.

"After I take care of you, I'll take care of Stupid Squad and Commander Weaktrully." Sportiflex said.

"HEY!" First Squad and Apetrully shouted.

Hope's left eye twitched and Hope ask, "What did you call them?"

"Stupid Squad and Commander Weaktrully." Sportiflex said.

"You shouldn't have said that." Hope said.

Hope took the gun right of Sportiflex's hands, turn around, there were some noises, and turn back around with the gun twisted into a shape of a bow. Sportiflex gulpped.

"You really shouldn't have said that." Hope said.

Sportiflex started to back away. Hope turned red with anger, steam came out of her ears, and she let out a gorilla roar. Sportiflex turned yellow and tried to run away, but Hope grabbed him by the legs and start to hit him on a tree.

Later at Big Green... Sportiflex, who was dressed as a nurse, was fanning First Squad, refilling drinks for Second Squad, and cleaning the Air Force's rockets and the Tank Army's tanks. He rested for a while until he heard a growl from Hope, who was holding a meat tenderizer, so he worked faster.

"Sometimes, she's kind of unpredictable." Apetrully said.

"You can say that again." Sportiflex said, stopping for a bit.

He heard a louder growl from Hope and started to work faster.


End file.
